Advice Male Perspective

When You’ve Lost Control of Your Spending

Just about everyone has an item or two that they can’t resist buying.  It could be clothes, shoes, liquor, sweets, electronics, movies, music, books, jewelry or even something more costly such as a car, boat, or house.  Whatever the item might be the simple reality is that when it comes to spending it’s essentially like kryptonite which everyone cannot help falling prey to.  Now there is nothing wrong with splurging on an item like that once in a while, but the key is to recognize when it’s gotten out of control.

For example, if the money you are using to purchase the item was meant to be used to pay for certain life necessities such as food, water, transportation, or a roof over your head that is a warning sign, particularly if it’s a regular occurrence.  Eventually, no matter how much you plan it will catch up with you and you will find yourself being delinquent when it comes to paying your bills which could result in you not having food to eat or even being evicted.  So it’s important to really think and be observant about whether or not this sort of pattern is happening or not and if so to curb it.

Another warning sign is if you find yourself having to defend what you’re spending to the people who are part of your life and you find yourself saying a phrase like “I’m not spending that much…I’m only buying small inexpensive items anyway”.  If your friends and family are starting to say something they may have picked up on issue that you are either in denial about or just not able to see.  If you’re faced with this scenario you need to first stop being so defensive and really think about whether or not they might have a point. Once you’ve opened you mind up to that possibility you need to pull together your various bills from the past couple of months or two and add them up.  Even small inexpensive items can take a good chunk out of your wallet that is usually far greater than you may have realized.  The key is to be aware of what’s going on and set a realistic limit that you will stick to each month.

A third warning sign is typically associated with sale items.  Almost every store is always touting some great deal or another that is only available for a limited time and in limited quantities.  This marketing approach is designed to panic you into buying the item because you might not get another chance.  However, if you step back for a moment and think you may realize that the item they’re offering isn’t one you really want and that your only reason for buying it is the belief that it’s such a great deal.  Often, a sales pitch is designed to play off your emotions and a sense of urgency instead of your rational thinking, which if you utilize will often lead to you realizing that you don’t even care about the item.  So when encountering a great deal pick up the item and walk around the store for a bit to think about if it’s something you really want or need.  Once you’ve completed your walk around the store you may find yourself putting the item back and saving your money for something you really want.

A final warning sign relates to those who collect things.  Many may think they don’t collect anything, but often when you check a cupboard or a closet you’ll find that simply isn’t the case.  Typically, the collection will be justified by stating that they are items that are needed, but when you already have fifty large sized candles in your closet, getting another ten, even if they are on sale, is probably not the best idea.  Very often the aforementioned is how many people end up becoming hoarders, and if that happens, the end result can become being weighted down by all of your items.  It can get so bad that your very possessions will hold you back from doing what you want to do with your life and no item no matter how great is worth that.  Instead you should regularly be going through your things so you’re aware of what you currently own and try to use up what you already have before you purchase more.  If you do you’ll find yourself with a lot more money to spend on other things like a vacation.

Lastly, very often people purchase things to make themselves feel better about their lives and their choices.  Doing that once in a while is not a bad thing, but it’s important to do it in moderation so it doesn’t become a crutch.  (If you feel you’ve become addicted to spending there are various counselling services you can seek out for assistance.)  Taking such a balanced approach will ultimately lead to a more prosperous and happy future in which you’ll have a

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